Wednesday, December 23, 2009

scared nervous terrified
even cant sleep right now.
gosh.....


Tuesday, December 22, 2009

all my bags are packed

finally
after working tomorrow straight to KL.
gotta be at lavender road before 8pm

see you guys,
if i do make it out of the operation room alive.
wish me luck
or anyone wanna drop down to see me before i go?
maybe it will really be the last time you ever see me.
lol

=p

but if i dont
i wish my words could be spread through all of you all those some who hasnt seen my blog before.
i just wanna say thanks for everything guys.
good and bad times.
to some people i did hurt i think its karma for me.
well i did live up my life to the fullest.
got a good career, traveled most of the world, made up with my family, even did fell in love, deeply.
they were ups and down,
i guess i had accomplished alot for this past 24 years.
haha
typing like im gonna die!
maybe if i dont make it, i'll ask someone to type a last post for me.


well thats it for now.
take care
merry christmas and happy new year to you all

weak, very weak

wish you guys a very merry chirstmas to all
cause
i wont be here.
im going to kl
not for holidays,

butt for my lungs operation.

again.
such a nice way to spend my festive seasons.


ho ho ho
WTF were you guys trying to do?
bringing me to old kallang aiport!!!!!!
siaw!!!

i dont wanna go there still you guys wanna drag me!
and even driving pass her house??
seriously,
im over it, whats the point you all go and ask me
talk to her.
patch things up.

i already did ok?
please,
pointless, we are both leading our separate lives.
she already made a point that she doesnt want me back
and i too asked her to go.

seriously,
this aint a romantic comedy movie.
its life.


Monday, December 21, 2009

finally, some peace and quiet around here.

back to tranquility
im sorry
miss yuyi.
but i think we should not start anything special yet.
maybe we rushed too fast about this.
cause you know we have to bond together so we can make it happen
so one step at a time.
i dont want this to hurt us both.





and to you.

please,
go,
be happy with your life
why are you still clinging on here?
i am freaking pissed.
just say that you left a mark that you are a garbage.
the last bad impression you gave me was a big impact.
still sms-ing me for oh some reasons or explanation.
or are you seeking attention?
or you cant just let go?
what do you really want from me??

since that way
i hope you can just go, far far away from here.
go to him for all i care.
since you love him sooooo much,
get going.
leave out everything here.
why do you even bother what i say?
does it affects so much?
sometimes,
i wish i never knew you from the start.
was my biggest mistake to love or care or cried for someone thats so foolishy living in her little world.
face the facts, it was your own fault to what're now.
you cant compromise things
you say this and that.
always wanted to be diplomatic.
suck it,
its reality,
ughhh,
to think i loved something disgusting that time.
now,
i can see when you needed someone you treat them damn nice.
after you've got what you want,
or got a bigger bite.
u just leave them feel miserable.



thanks
for nothing.
please fuck off.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

lol
are you serious?
i think YOU dont know me that well
u fuck arrogant.
whats the point?
you'll always be the spoil brat who will always say:
I know everything better than you.
I am always right.
You do always keep on making things complicated for yourself
Try to think, GROW UP.
There is time to be humble sometimes.
Well dude, speechless,
but im still confused?
Why does lil old me got to do with YOU?
Can't you see that im tired of you.
You connect to her.
Her= Trouble, alot of fussy fussy trouble.
can't get the facts that youre just some kid im trying to get rid of?

Well that was quite a show you put there.
hoorah.
round of applause and a standing obation for you.
time to pick up your toys and get going
talk the talk when you CAN walk the walk.

i pity you.

Friday, December 18, 2009

lucky im in love with my bestfriend

we laughed
we kissed
we cried
we shared
we found

each other.
=]

oh yes, december was a really good month
miss yuyi, haha love ya

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

kids these days.

=]

Sunday, December 13, 2009

was at home whole day
haha
so decided to clean up my messy messy wardrobe
=]
haha
took me 3 hours just to organize everything!

but, it was fun though,
never thought i got a lot of stuffs inside!!
like,

Hershey's kisses.
=]













my work permit picture.
i was damn fat that time.

















also, those that paused me for a few seconds
the shortest moment which was my happiest moment
for a short moment, i did made me happy.


a small little note
from ms taiwan
but you cant see the smile as same as last time.
















a letter from
from miss indonesia
yes, it still has the gucci smell.















well,
i stopped for a moment,
thinking about those memories i had with both of them.
with a smile.. just a memento.
moving along as i know i will.
goodbye past.
=]


the rebellion begins

The leader of Hazard Minors.

We did supported you all the way being.
And following your leadership for a long long time.
its been 4 years, your time is up.

There is no achievement you did.
It was a good start for you.
Getting performance, shows so we can push up our name.
I was damn proud to be one of the greatest crew i ever thought.
Even proud to wear out my HM crew tee and name tag.

Once you did told us, we dance just to express.
Cause we are bros whom loves to dance
it was what you thought me....
fame and fortune in the shuffling scene is nothing, just have fun.

But i speak up to all of them.
Since when we want money or profits for ourselves?
We did not started to being greedy for anything.
Who was the one who started this.
Dont think it us whom changed.
It was you, seriously
What you did type in your blog was outrages.
We never hold any grudges or TULAN!
why oh why you wanna start up the fire again?
and typing those silly words.
if you are happy with them just type out you are happy with them.
please dont revolve around us again.

Imaturity is isnt something you can get, its something you learn by yourselves.
seriously,
imaturity begins with immature people judging people immaturely.
sad that you should know this better since youre the leader.

Well it's time.
I stepped up for all of them.
I WILL CLAIM THE TITLE OF LEADER OF THE WHOLE HAZARD MINORS.
believe me,
i dont wish, i will make it happen.


pooled with HM members yesterday.
fun fun!
and david, i know la, i owe you starbucks.
and ewwww. condoms
hahah.

Hazard Minors
i gotta claim it, i really want it.
i will make it better than ever.



another agenda.

well, we are drifting apart slowly.
its like we ran out of words about each other
weird.
we were so closed but now, its boredom to us,
but i'll hang on.
=]

Friday, December 11, 2009

im planned to go zouk out.but i saw someone whom is going, so i dont want to spoil my whole day mood if i was there. so i sold myticket 80 bucks to my friend. so ZIRCA here i come!    =)

cant be mended

why did i had a dream about her last night?
when we were together,
hugging and kissing her,
sneaking late at night at her house.
sharing ciggies when we we almost broke.
always going out all the time.
and i said i love you alot of times.
and she going infront of me at the escalator so that she can hug me.
and even worrying about her when she went for her china trip
and was afraid that she wont come back?
and also watching those lame lame phua chu kang episodes.
even dreamt bout her waiting for me to finish work.
and whining about me not being on time.



those happy times.
why did it just go by just saying just break up?
stupid mistake.
well its life, you can undo or erase those decisions what you choose.
cant be mended back as it used to.





damn brain stop playing tricks on me.
i just want myself to be happy.
pain, youre satisfying yourself alot huh?

ahh....
memories.
=]
well back to reality.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

fuck

slipped down when i was shuffling in the room
collapsed and sprained one of my leg muscle.


just great.
i started the game,
so i ended it.

just a few glimpse of her.
makes me wanna take back the same road again.
i wish i can just speak out to her.
even just a simple "Hi"
but is it worth all of it now?

for what i decided before all these.
i think it was for the best.
no point of worrying and stressing yourself to that someone.
because that someone doesnt know how you feel.


another agenda:
i got my lungs results.
things are not doing good for me.
need to face the operating room again.
haiz
die!

wish i could just really die while they operate me.
makes me suffer more.
=[

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

die

lost my voice.
lol
and almost choked on slice cucumber!
damn soi!
hang on, just hang on,
one more day of breakfest shift then youre freee!!!!

but nt going to zouk out.
tickets are way too exp.




another agenda:

thought you were better than all of them. but what you said, makes me disappointed about you.

because immaturity begins with immature people judging people immaturily

if you think youre right, then i'll let it be,
i dont wanna waste my energy to talk bout it already.

=]

so all the best to you.

Monday, December 7, 2009

FUCK

I OVERSLEPT!!!!
late for work again.
lol
got a phone call at 5.30am! when i should have wake up at 3am

maybe too tired and go out till around 11 plus.
whats adding it worse is im sick.
fever, flu cough at the same time.
seeing things double and keep having migraines
this feeling sucks
but tonight's gonna be a good night,
maybe... well off to bed
gotta wake up at 3am again.
=[



anybody wanna wakeup call me?

please?

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Being rich doesnt give you the right to shout at others or to kick up a scene.

It only shows how immature you are



bitch.


also....

you have to belief what you saw . No matter what your explanation is , my heart still belief my eyes.

thats why things cant changed back as it was, sorry.


another agenda,
east coast park session with ms yuyi!
haha
it was fun, beside the prawn fishing part.
wasted and its boring, better waste the money for heinekken.
=]
thanks alot ms. yuyi.
i had fun and yes...
we both walked the same road before....

=]

Friday, December 4, 2009

addicted

day and night.
The lonely loner seems to free his mind at night
=]


another agenda:
focus dominic please focus dammit!!!

=]

Thursday, December 3, 2009

hi,
how are you doing up there?
its been almost a month....
but i hope your doing fine,
i had a dream about you,
oh as magical it was,
you're there smiling and greeting me with your open arms,
i do miss those times.
haha..
dont worry bout your parents.
they are fine,
and i even called them once a week.
remember those time?
when your mum picked up the phone

me: hello? is SHE there?
her mum: huh? who are you? whos this ah?
me: erm.. dominic.. her friend
her mum: ohhh youre the guy she said you cute ah???
her: MUM!~~ dont embarrass me ler......

lol

well im sorry to put you alot of hardship with my stubbornness last time.
i ignored your feelings, it was nothing but heartaches.
but we cant change it back as it was used to be.
but
thank you for all the times you've put up to me,
and i know that we'll meet someday.
when the time is right.
but for the time now,
im just waiting for the right person,
like you said.
=]
but more important, career is my priority now.
well im glad things turned out just like old times,


with love.


=]
december is a really good month

bloody november!
glad thats over


You said you didn't want to see me get hurt, so does that mean you closed your eyes when I cried?


all my bags are packed im ready to go.

=]

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

then
is he gonna be there
by your side
when you need him the most?
When you need a shoulder to cry on?
When you just need a hug to make you feel better
when you just want to see his smile
or even you need a kiss cause you just miss him?

He cant right?
But he will always be by your side in the phone.
Which i think its pointless
sooner or later it will drift apart
i know so.

Monday, November 30, 2009

went for the meetup today.
just wasnt the same anymore.
getting less shufflers over there.
even the organizer came late,
made a move without telling all and keeping the speaker for the electro dancers.

but least im happy to see my HM members.












you guys melted me alot...
i will come back for you all.
=]
thanks for accpeting me back as a family.
=]






and went zirca.
meet HSRockerz after oh so long.
was happy that they never changed
=]
























off to bed.
wednesday steamboat anyone?

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Im not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found out a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear

I've found out a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You

and the reason is You [x3]

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found out a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you






thats why, you cant the see the old me.
ah do is really no more, gone,faded,deleted.
gonna move to another blog soon.
this blog has too much bad memories in it.



another agenda.
zirca was fun fun!
haha
met rjin and the hsrockerz after so long.
even met with nas.
happy to see them all.
but shitty psychedelic trance.
psychedelic is too messy.
=]

and jonathan, better rest your fingers.
praying for your recovery now.
haha
still got time to follow me to buy watch ah?
give up!
i will be strong,
like how i dealt with my past experience.
which has been doing just fine,

im sick of melting my heart and expressing my feelings for girls anymore.

they just are some dumb species i guess which cant think properly.
they dont think through their mind, they think following expressions.
who doesnt give a chance to you when you messed up big time and wanted to patch back, but liking someone who was comforting her through her tough times.
i feel like im treated like a snack pack in 7-11.
if you get bored of other stuffs, then you will just come and find me back.
it feels like shit.
or even cant forget those guys who hurted them and thought i will be the same.
seriously, if you cant forget about that guy, go, try again. for all i care, dont think i never got hurt from relationships.
or even if she goes back to her hometown, she cant devoted herself to that guy 100%
lame. seriously, if far distance relationship is an excuse we cant make it, why can others do it, but not you.

i aint weak like last time.
and im laughing to myself...
to think that you those in the past are worthy to be loved and i lose control of myself to you all.
the tables have turned, you cant change me back to last time.
i dont wanna be the weak,sick,pathetic loser.
and to think girls i fell for last are very very special to me till i got hurt.
guess again... you all are not worthy
such pesticides and low life creature you all dont deserve to be a friend or someone to talk to and you all lost my respect.


and not to all of the women i met.
just a few people i know.
so no harsh feelings.
i apologise in advance for the other females readers whom are reading this.

Saturday, November 28, 2009


thanks shushu

you made me cried!

=]

off to zirca!!!

=]
please, to you.
i know you care
but the more you come and say take care and i'll be your friend
the more i go *ughhh* and annoyed.
the more hatred it will be.
and i dont blame anyone of you.
i dont need all this shit again.

some people have different ways to handle a broken heart
just take it as my way
i want things to be simple,
if youre not important to me, i wont talk to you.
easy as that.





another agenda,
jonathan james edmund.
take care of yourself ok?
you almost cut off 3 of your fingers god damn it!!!
made me worried for the rest of the day only.
basket.
but hope youre doing fine.
gonna visit you tomorrow, dont worry

Friday, November 27, 2009

You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

You were everything, everything
That I wanted,
We were meant to be, supposed to be
But we lost it
All of the memories so close to me
Just fade away

All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending

different path of roads.

please,
dont make me more miserable.
u did hurt me and make me sad already. it's enough.
why are you afraid of those gossips?
if youre happy with the person in the work place is the gossip so important?
seriously.
what outcome can you get if you keep holding on something that cant be yours?
you did tell your friend about this.
forget about that guy and move along, but can you?
give up...
you said your not worthy.
but to me you are.
i was dumb to let you go at the first place,
if you cant give trust to me,
then i have nothing to say.

just let me be,
dont come and hurt me more
and make me more miserable already
we walked our different path once and for all.

goodbye.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

enough of this shit.


i wont open to anyone anymore

i dont wanna get hurt again


i've been dumb and silly

to think love is magical and sweet


to me now.
it's bitter and fucked up things to do.


goodbye and good grief

once and for all.

my heart stop beating

didn't even go the chance to tell you in person, and i got shot down.

Do, as yr fren im so glad that i can bring u d hapiness.
But i havent finnd my hapiness yet.
I take my job and d time being with friends as my medicine.
U guys make my life happy, but not my heart.
Now my mind is tranquil as water.
i still got d heart for somebody, but in what sense?
He is not d one i can give hope. Not important anymore......
At d same time, i cant take d heart pain again.
Havent cured yet...
Hope you can understand......



why cant i be the one to make you happy?
if you do give me a chance, i swear i wont break your heart...
bah...
this happened to me 3 times.
i had my chance, i fuck it all up
3 of you.
why cant you see?
i've changed
im not like last time......
sigh...
i was infront of you for you all the time?


but i guess,
im not worthy

it did break me,
alot.
i always do make my life miserable.
wish i could go back, forget about everything here.
i wanna rot myself to death in my room.
i hate it here even more.




goodbye.



Wednesday, November 25, 2009

I ♥ You
















i'm always shy of expressing myself.
but i just want to say out something

liu yu-jen,

i you.
i want to be that person who will always be there for you.
i really do.


oh ya.
congrats to suttia for the upcoming wedding.
sorry i cant make it.
but have a prosperous and joyful future ahead with with your wife.
it's good to see someone getting married with someone they love,
=]
























=]











girl oh girl.
you we're there when i was alone
asking you out for a movie.
keeping mochi for me so that others dont eat it all.
asking me wheter im fine even your at your hometown that time.
hanging out with you at tpy and saw someone stepping on a mouse
gave me hopes and smile when i was down
asking me to cheer up when i was sad
calling me up asking me wheter im ok
i know we have been through this situations.
and know i know, i've found something that makes me happy.

you.


=]



what's for dinner?
aww.... by this time back at home
i dont need to fuss what to eat..
these below makes me miss home more.
=[













beef noodle














mani chai















ais kacang
















song kheng hai's belacan bee hon... aww....















salad chicken rice

















kueh chap



















kolo mee
















LAKSA!!!






i miss home badly....
=[
i wanna go home....
=[


haha
Why no kulu kulu sound!?
cute cute.

=]


and btw.
saw someone stepped on a rat yesterday.
poor thing.
and short shriek and a crack sound.
then it just stop moving.
shiversssssss
and
thanks sophia.
slacking out with me, and being there.
haha

Sunday, November 22, 2009

well enough said

here's to all
rocking but not for the scene anymore.

someone told me this today


Dom, do you got any outside problem?

Huh? no... why so?

No la, you seem different already, and it's not like you.

Why do you say that chef?

I think you really lost focus on your work, you seem to be forgetful these past few months.

Really?? Die! Haha

Not funny Dom, seriously, you've changed.

Erm... seriously chef?

Yea, last time, you came to work with your smiling cheerful and energetic self. You love your work
Now, seems like you quiet down, not active as before, and you're standard has gone down rapidly
And it's like really you are forced to come down here, and go back, and you lost your passion.
Are you really ok Dom? This is not you. Are you sick? Tired or stressed out? Is it because of your breakup last time it affected you?
Do you need a vacation Dom?

........
I'm sorry chef, i will do my best in future.
i wont dissapoint you next time.

Please take care Dom, we really need the old you back. =]
We missed the old you. Funny, charming, blurish, cursing here and there if youre stressed out.
Anything, you can find me.

Thank you chef.








Hmm......
Did i really change to that?
I think it did after today.
Maybe it's just a phase.
Even my shuffle friends said so.
I lost my touch, my smile, my funny laughter.

Even slackshoes "Ah Do, i know youre changing, it's good, but please dont change to worst ok?"
Helmy saw me and said "Ah Do, you changed alot sia!"
I was left speechless.
but i think mean i lost my zen, im very quiet recently.

Even at work i did ignore Sabrina,
cause just i thought just forget bout everything in the past and mind my own businees.
Until today i saw her face to face, ignore her and she called my name i didnt replied.
Until she yelled:
"DOMINIC!! Whats going on?! Why are you like this now??? This is not you!!!!! I Hate you."
i even saw tears while she walked away.
This is the second time i made a girl cried with my actions.
Another great thing to do.
Seriously, after this. I'm gonna be ignored by all the ladies staffs tomorrow.

Seriously, i feel fine, my emotional state is balance, i dont cry myself to bed.
i eat regulary but still getting skinnier.
Is it cause of the gene-generation leukemia?
FUCK NO! I DONT WANNA DIE SOON!
haha.
but yea.
gonna check up my lungs.
seem to be coughing lot now.

don't worry i'll be strong
haha
=]
i know i will.
i've been through this alone for the past 3 months.
=]
pray i dont hear the word operation, hospital or positive for leukemia.


Thursday, November 19, 2009

i cleaned up my wardrobe. and gosh lots of unwanted things i saw.
for an example.
my shuffling gears.
so, guys, i'm selling off all my shuffle gears.
pictures below:
















i canX shuffle tee(L) $25, Hazard Minors tee *Long Sleeve*(L) $25, F**K Battle tee *ah do aka cyroghenics* (M) $25, E.M.O tee *Pink* (M) $25
price are negotiable. only for singapore.
















baxx classic tee(L) $70, baxx royale *blue*(L) $60, baxx royale *grey* (M) $60, Hardstyle Republic 9th edition (M) $70
price are negotiable. only for singapore.
















baxx v2 *ltd edition* (M) $200, baxx classic tee(L) $70.
price are negotiable. only for singapore.

















baxx v4 (M) $140, baxx icecream (M) $140.
price are negotiable. only for singapore.
















baxx v4 (M) $140, baxx icecream (M) $140.
price are negotiable. only for singapore.






i only accpet full payment.
no installments. =]

contact me if you interested

oh ya...
i had my very FIRST subway dinner with sophia.
haha.
























ordered Italian B.M.T with pamersan oregano bread.
lol
extra olives extra lettuce and a dab of sweet onion vinaigrette .
i think it's better than a McSpicy.
and thanks sophia accompanying dinner with me.
then headed to watch 2012.
kinda nice, touching story too..

and sophia, sorry la!
i thought you said the president was cute,
how would i know you were talking about the indian geologist son.
give up!!
=]
damn november rain

hate it.
makes me lazy and tired.
i wanna go out~!
when im with her
she's caring, understanding
i feel warm and safe
we dont quarrel much

when im with you
you're unreasonable and rebellious
i feel sad and insecure
we quarrel most of the times

when i was alone
she was there for, cheering me up.
you.... you did nothing.


i was dumb,
i was blind,
so after all this.
i know clinging on something so stupid.
its not worth it.
so i say goodbye to you with a kiss.

Friday, November 6, 2009
















thanks for the chocolates you all.
=]

life is like a box of chocolates,
you'll never know what will you get.
last text i got,

thank you uncle Ng

do, asleep already?
if you are, good, dont bother to reply, you need your rest. =X
but wish i was beside you, watching you falling asleep.
it's just so adorable. awwwww...... :)
i cant bear to see you like this :(
i wish i was strong like you
if i do have 1 wish that makes it come true, it's you and me, do
i really love you. :)
even you came back for holidays
i was so nervous or anxious to see you.
even though it's not the same, but im just glad that i can see you,
because you meant a lot to me :)
i want you mine forever, teehee...
i remembered how we met,
party at my friends house and there you were, standing in front of me mingling with your friends.
:)
really fun times. you we're really a geek that time.
appearance do change, but inside you're still you.
im glad that you never changed a lot.
but, it hurts to see someone i love to get hurt.
really, i feel so weak and helpless, i know you're all alone, but do remember
i'll always be there to help you cross any obstacles you're going through.
i hope you and her do go back together, even it kills me but, i just want you happy.
:)
hehe.. sorry for this sms
i know it's not the right time to write this but,
it's better late than never.
so, cheer up, or do you still wan me for you to play a song for you?
hehe... its up to you.
talk to you later ok?
if there's anything, call me or text me.
you know i'll be there

well gtg now, bb, sweet dreams ya. =X




you're still you even in sms.
=]
thanks for the final sms
and thank you for being there.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

unappreciated you.

i got a phone call at 6.45am yesterday.
it was her number, but it wasnt her at the phone.

are you ah do?
er... yes? who's this?
im her father.
eh? hello uncle, how are you? long time no see, why did you call me?
what i just wanted to say,
she was hit by car this morning, and she didnt make it in the ICU.
just want to let you know, the story...


the only thing i can from behind is sobs and weeping in the emergency room.

i was numb.
i was speechless.
completely blanked.
on the 5th November 2009, 6.45am.
you have left us from this world to join the Lord.

for the past few months, you saw me suffering.
you were always there, comforting me,
even though your back there, you always had faith on me.

ah do, i know you can do it, you're not that weak,
and i exploded on here saying
you dont know how it's like to lost someone you love

yes, you were my first love,
and still over there, you tried your best and never gave up on me
cried and cried that you wanted me back badly.
even though i had someone that time,
even i wasnt attached and missing someone else,
you still were cheerful and waited for me.
i remembered how you played the piano
playing wait for you through my webcam,
i remembered you post those chocolates for my birthday.
gosh with a letter that i just threw out.
accompanying and visited my parents, cause i told you they felt lonely and missing me.
even helped my sister to celebrated her birthday.
even was there at my operation room when i had my lungs operations.
and i just ignored you and told you to get lost.

really those sayings were true

you never regret till it's gone,
now youre gone,
i hope you can rest peacefully,
i hope you are doing well.
i hope you can just understand this.

i'm sorry that i didnt appreciated you from the start
i remember how u wanted to hang on even i said i wanted to stop this
you were still compromising my bad temper and tantrums.
really, even last night after i had a long conversation with her,
you told me everything is going to be ok.
im yours whenever youre ready.
with a cheerful face.
but now, i cant see that smile anymore.
i cant even talk to you, or text or call you anymore
how is it going to be ok? it adds more pain for what i got now.

but after all this, i guess i wasnt meant to be loved by others,
cause i dont appreciate, but for you,
i will change, i know you'll be watching from the clouds above.
and with your special smiling face.

but for now, im pretty sure i wont start a relationship that soon.
i gotta need some time alone..
even away from my friends.

goodbye,
rest in peace.
and yea, im pretty sure.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

i love you grandma




so touching....

i miss my grandma
even though i dont have remember how was she
cause she passed
away when i was really really young at the age of 4
but from all said
"grandma love you alot,
she was always there for you all the time,"
she brought you to everywhere she goes, shopping, walk in the park, mingling with friends, and even brought me to her mahjong game

she had leukemia, and she was weak,
and it was at a critical stage and there's no way to cure it.....
her last words
" tell do
do im sorry, i couldnt make it when he graduates, advicing him about life, seeing him falling in love, or seeing him in his weeding suit, but i will always be beside him watching over him"
that was her last words before her last breath

grandma,
from the pictures i can tell,
pictures wo
rth a thousand words,
and thank you,
even though im not a very good grandson,
and disobeying daddy and mummy most of the time,
im sorry about that,
and thank you,
and im happy that you are proud of me being your grandson.
and im glad to have a grandma like you,
i know you'll always be there for me,
and im trying my best to grow up to the person you want me to be,
yea, we can still talk and meet in my dreams
but till then, someday i will be there for you,
taking care of you,
just a matter of time, and sorry to keep you waiting
and dont worry grandma, im not planning to die that soon,
just go with the flow,
till its really my time till i can see you,

and now, i will put my head up high,
for you grandma,
i'll be strong.

i love you.






and also tha
nks again jeremi for the t-hirt
=]
really nice

BEER FACTOR













well off to bed now
=]



till then